Hello, pimple that has chosen a very strategic place for its presence to be known; that is on the tip of my nose. You're making me look like that reindeer that is always teased by the other cooler reindeers. But no, I shall look up with pride! You will not bring me down. People might laugh and poke fun at me with you around but no more! And besides, just in time for Christmas, eh? I don't need to look for red noses to disguise myself as a reindeer this year.
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I've always thought of myself to be an impulsive person. No, I'm not flattering myself since impulsiveness is not really a trait you should be proud. But you should be. Proud, I mean. Not impulsive. Wait..no, you should be proud that you're impulsive if you are impulsive. If you're not, then you should be. Impulsive, I mean.
Oh, gosh. I'm flattering myself now.
There is a very fine line between impulsiveness and spontaneity. I like to believe that I'm a little bit of both; like how I'm on that fine line and I can take a step to both sides anytime I want. Because I'm a brat like that. I don't get why people tend to view impulsiveness as a negative thing. Actually, I don't know what is that one factor that distinguishes between those two. People say being spontaneous is good while impulsive is all 'you have problems, dude'. But if you look up the definition, they're actually pretty much the same thing.
Gahh, I don't know where I'm going with this. I'll continue this post with sponpulsive because I can't decide if I'm impulsive or spontaneous now. I thought I was impulsive, then spontaneous. So, I'll be both. Tadaa.
I like buying CDs without much thought of the price. If I like a certain dress or bagpack, I will buy it. Because there's always a nagging thought that if I go there the next time to buy that CD/dress/bag/whatever, it will not be there anymore. Okay, you might be going, 'Ooh, this is impulsive'. Whatever. But, I remember that one time when I saw a CD and considered the price and then, decided not to buy it. On the way home, I felt like shit. It was such an uncomfortable ride home that I couldn't sit still because of that nagging thought haunting my mind. And yes, it ended up not being there the next time I visited. From that day, I told myself that if I see anything I like or want, I'll get it. No matter what the cost (of course I'm talking about a reasonable purchase. Because I won't go into Louis Vuitton and stomp my feet and say I want that RM5980239870 bag) is. Because to be feeling crappy and having mental battles is no fun. I've been there and I hate it.
But the thing is that despite people calling this as impulsive shopping, it's not. I like to believe that it's sponpulsive shopping. Yes, it is probably an impulsive purchase but I don't regret buying it later. I don't go telling myself what an idiot I was to buy a toy camera (which I did) that needs actual rolls of film because it felt right at that moment. Instead, I feel happy and good about it. Like how you would feel after doing something spontaneous with friends. For example, poking a stranger and running away. What I'm trying to say is that it's basically impulsive behaviour with spontaneous aftereffects. Sponpulsive!
However, I'm a little worried about how far I can go on with this. Sponpulsive shopping is one thing. What if I've done something permanent out of sponpulsiveness but regretting it later? I would totally cry a fucking river kay? Because that miserable feeling with forever be with me. Because I've done something permanent out of sponpulsiveness. Gah, why am I rephrasing whatever I've just said?
But yeah, I'm planning to do something permanent. But so many doubts in my head. Oh, wait. Is this premeditated sponpulsiveness? Because I've been considering and planning before going all sponpulsive? Premeditated sponpulsiveness. What a fucking oxymoron.
Why am I badgering myself with these concerns that have no benefits to me at the moment? I need to study. Gaaaahhh.
2 comments:
Spontaneous always sound way better than impulsive.
But when you say that you're spontaneous, it makes it sound like you're flattering yourself but then when you said 'impulsive', it's demeaning yourself.
You know you won't have this problem of 'to-buy-or-not-to-buy' when we go shopping together. ;)
'Premeditated sponpulsiveness' sounds like a crime.
WE need to study. Meh. Back to studying for me as well. :D
That's the thing. They're practically synonyms but people have different opinions on the words.
WORD DISCRIMINATION.
HAHAHAHA, it does not sound like a crime. It sounds like what it sounds like. AN OXYMORON.
And yes, we do. I NEEDA STUDEHHH BUT I NO STUDEHH *sings*
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