Dainty.

It's Blonde Post Day, ladies and gentlemen. Be warned, this post is fueled completely by hormones.

Blonde No.1 - Eric Christian Olsen

I'm not usually that kind of person who giggles over some cute guy on TV. Because well, there are many cute, topless guys on TV (See : 90210, teen-drama-series-with-lots-of-sex-and-booze) but I think it was destiny that brought him to me. I don't watch NCIS : Los Angeles because I don't think it's a show that is worth investing my time in. But it so happens that I was bored (yeah, isn't that always the case when you meet cute guys on TV?) and I saw him on TV. I saw him and he instantly grabbed my attention with his flirty smile and floppy hair. And his sense of humour. And he was carrying a gun (don't I just love men with guns?). While wearing some shirt that was totally made to make him body look so damn yum. So, mind you. He wasn't naked or by any beach doing that Baywatch slow mo run. He was an agent, saving the world while flirting with women and his partner with a really hot shirt on and gun by his side. And also, being very funny.

But that's not it. After that episode, I watched a movie on Diva Universal and guess who was the hot nephew who's a total flirt, sells cars like he's giving you his love, hilarious and has floppy hair? And I was like, 'Oh my gosh, hot blonde guy. I don't know what's your name but unggg, so hot'. Of course I watched the movie til the very last bit when he finally wins his true love and eats popcorn with Parmesan cheese with her. Isn't he eccentric? Parmesan cheese with popcorn. Okay, so it's his character but whatever. Still, he portrayed his character so damn bloody well that I told myself to send some gooey cheesed popcorn to him.

OH MY GOSH. How can I leave out the most important detail? He has the most amazing facial hair. Facial hair that is so amazing that I could just imagine him rubbing his face full of that sexy stubbles on my bod - uhm, yeah. He has incredible facial hair.

LOOK AT THE FACIAL HAIR UNG.

So, gooey popcorn. Is that it, you might ask? Of course not! I watched The Thing just now and again, guess who is the hot assistant to some douchey professor? C'mon, it's not that hard to guess. Okay, it's the hot blonde guy who I still don't have a clue what his name is. And I was in the cinema just staring at him wearing hot clothes (Fur coat and lots of thick sweaters. What did you think I was talking about?) and decided that this is destiny's work in progress.

And then I learned of his name. Eric Christian Olsen. Ung.

DESTINY. He is mine, bitchez.

Blonde No.2 - Mark Foster

Okay, firstly. He is a dirty blonde. He is. He might look like he has brown hair but he is a dirtay blonde. And I meant it both ways. Because I always imagine him doing dirty things to me with his lips and facial hair. Uhm, what?

I've heard Foster The People's album and I didn't like it at first but it's getting to me now. Just like how you need time to brew tea, listening to Foster The People and MGMT needs some brewing time. And they sound pwoah in the album and they are pwoah-er live.

I love this video because they sound so fucking badass here and also, hate this video for having an abrupt end.

Mark Foster. Looks so good with wet t-shirts. And wet hair. He makes my ovaries do a little jump whenever I see him all soaked in sweat. He needs to get wet and sweaty all the fucking time. Because he is bringing happiness to the world. And when the world is happy, there is no war. Mark Foster in a sweat soaked t-shirt has the potential to stop wars. See where this is going? I'm advocating peace in an unconventional manner. And Mark Foster needs to be my poster boy. With sweaty t-shirts. And hot shades. To protect his eyes from all the sun that is making him sweat that much, duh.

So hot. Ung. I want to see Mark Foster live. With Foster The People too. What, do I look like those kind of fan who would pay to look at hot, sweaty frontmen and not give two fucks about the music? My motto is always music first, hot members second. Always.

But Mark Foster. *grabby hands*

Indeed, I will.